☆♫♪ Happy New Year ♪♫☆ Bring on 20-10 ♥

well we are at the end of 2009 this year has been a hard one for me and my family, ( and so many others I know too )
this last week we had a hospital visit for Bloods and Dr appointment all went good...

Plans for Jan 2010--☆☆
Lets hope we have a great year ahead for this family as we so need a good one

Jan the 1st --We catch up with friends from Adelaide having a BBQ lunch here ♥

 Jan the 3rd-- We are off to Movie world with friends from Adelaide too, we are using the passes we bought in July for Alex's birthday but she was not cleared for the trip so will enjoy that before Hubby goes back to work!!!!! funnily enough he goes back to work on my dad's Birthday :( will be a hard day for me I think I so need to grieve but when will I get to do that I have no Idea...

Jan the 23rd-- Robyn will be 3 OMG where did that go she is my baby ♥ so we are going to try do a small party for her and a school starters etc all tied in together....

Jan the 27th --Alex starts Prep OMG she is growing up to fast (Sniff).. will post her in her uniform when we get it hehe...

we are still waiting on a parcel from Adelaide that has not arrived it has Xmas pressies for us all :( so hope it didn't get lost in the strikes etc

well no photos as have been slack this week and just relaxing til the year comes to an end today has gone fast but I have slept most of it as didn't get much last night :( will sit and see if we can watch some NYE things on TV :)

Fun times ahead for the family ♥

Dr's Appointment went well yesterday Alex had bloods but was through a finger prick she so hates them ARGH but on the 13th we will get it done through port as she also is having a CT scan and needs to be accessed.
the Dr was happy with her but not with her weight a small loss since the tube has come out :( but she is trying to eat more but in saying that is also burning it off with running around like a 5 yr old lol

ok well not much else happening here am off to Movie world this weekend for the day so that should be fun and its New Years eve soon too  we are off to a friends for a couple of hours then home with Friends dropping around the next day for a BBQ lunch :)

           

Girls enjoying their christmas present 24th Dec 09 

Poem "A Pair of Shoes"

“A Pair of Shoes”

♥From Clear day childhood cancer support group♥

I am wearing a pair of shoes. They are ugly shoes. Uncomfortable shoes. I hate my shoes. Each day I wear them, and each day I wish I had another pair. Some days my shoes hurt so bad that I do not think I can take another step.

Yet, I continue to wear them. I get funny looks wearing these shoes. They are looks of sympathy. I can tell in others eyes that they are glad they are my shoes and not theirs. They never talk about my shoes.

To learn how awful my shoes are might make them uncomfortable. To truly understand these shoes you must walk in them. But, once you put them on, you can never take them off. I now realize that I am not the only one who wears these shoes. There are many pairs in this world.

Some people are like me and ache daily as they try and walk in them. Some have learned how to walk in them so they don’t hurt quite as much. Some have worn the shoes so long that days will go by before they think about how much they hurt.

No one deserves to wear these shoes. Yet, because of these shoes I am a stronger person. These shoes have given me the strength to face anything. They have made me who I am. I will forever walk in the shoes of a person who has a child with Cancer.

 

thought I would share this with everyone

here are the girls enjoying some time outside before the rain started this week and an icypol lol and my photography is slowly improving these straight out of camera no editing

Christmas week and weekend {Photos}

photos from the last week with some lights and Christmas photos added too,

top left is the girls drinking cordial in their festive cups ♥

Top Right is some lights we went to look at on Christmas Eve

Left is Robyn in my Mrs Claus costume ♥

Above is me and Hubby ready for Christmas pressies with the girls Alex took the Photo ♥

we have had Rain Rain and more Rain but like QLD its still Hot Hot Hot lol, do love sleeping with rain but it was so heavy last night, we will have another parcel arrive this week thanks to Australia Post being on strike it didn't arrive on time but we will do the surprise again for the girls hehe make it special lol...

Tuesday we are back at the hospital for bloods and to see the Dr. so will see if Alex has gained some weight now the tube is not feeding her, and hope not to have it back in. we then have 2 weeks off til the 13th Jan 2010 for the CT I am hoping she will drink the contrast so the tube will not be needed then either..

my studies are slowly going forward too have 4 assignments to do and got a HD on the last one :) have one almost finished not very good with PowerPoint presentations but having fun playing lol...

Alex has been enjoying her Christmas presents this year too playing non stop with them ♥ ok enough babbling from me BBL with some new  updates on the Thomas Family lol

♪♫ Merry Christmas ♫♪

Just a short post from me today to wish everyone out there a Very Merry Christmas it has been a lovely day, Girls enjoying their gifts and we had rain too :) (Of course this when we cooked a turkey breast and pork roast in the BBQ and no covered veranda just shade cloth lol)

Gotta love food and christmas hehe have photos will post later of the girls and the house lights we have been looking at around the area :)

Another day out

Sunday the 20th of Dec was the Circus day from Camp Quality, it rained the whole drive in and back with thunder while under the big top I went alone as hubby wanted to surprise the girls when they got home with a trampoline we got them "Finally" for Christmas (early)... plus Alex got a visit with a gift (Elliot the puppy arrived this morning ) I have registered the puppy so we should get dog tags etc and emails soon from him (Her lol as this is what Alex says its a Girl Mummy lol♥)

   Ashton Circus Dec 2009 thanks to Camp Quality

OK whats been happening the last week 1st Our house guest has moved on but that was a sad day Girls miss her but she is better off with out being chained up almost all day and night, we also set up the paddle pool for the girls with chlorine etc (no fence required due to size we double checked on that)  Christmas will be good we are invited to a friends place so will have a big Family Christmas ♥ Thanks Rossy and Family ♥ not much else is going on other than another NGT has gone but as the Dr said to give her a few days break we are so now 5 days she is eating small amounts so that's a good start now hope to see some weight gain !!!!

we gave the girls their trampoline early & hubby wrapped it for a surprise when we got home from the circus ♥

PS Sorry about the date I accidently posted this the other night before I had finished so has Saturdays date not today Monday the 21st Dec

PPS just had to add we did our last trip to the big shops was a good day last week first we got a Christmas hamper delivered from RED KITE (cancer support) then find a car park right out front of the lifts etc so was very pleased about that ♥ while in K-mart getting Hubby shorts a lady comes over and talks to me about Alex first she asks if its OK to ask etc very nice then she tells me of a book about natural therapies for cancer at the health store  I said Ill get over and look later as we are a little busy, I head out front and sit with the girls while Hubby lines up to pay for the shorts while waiting this lovely lady comes back and her Daughter hands us a book OMG I was speechless she had gone a bought this said book and given it to us she wished us a merry Christmas ╬  we wished them a happy Christmas & new year back ═╬═ the kindness of strangers  I was tearing up when Hubby finally got out and him seeing me in tears was normal to ask whats wrong but they where tears of happiness I still feel emotional about so many things but OMG we had a great day that day and hope this is a good sign of more great days to come ♥♥♥

~*Family Issues *~

wow this year has been a long one but still feels like it has gone fast.

we had a circus day this weekend from "Camp Quality" 

this was a none animal one but still should be a  good day out for the family

"VENT ALERT"

On a sad Note My sister has decided that she has a harder life than us even Alex (WTF) she had asthma and our parents left me with my grandparents to do what they need to do I never left Robyn with anyone except Daddy if It was an emergency run or with me when Daddy stayed with Alex on ward... Robyn does not miss out we give her alot to but the Chartres are about Alex she is the one with a life threatening illness I just wish she would grow up and act 37 not 12 she has always been this way expecting things to be handed over and now Mum and dad have passed away I am her only family ( I may be her next of Kin but she is not mine I have a husband and 2 daughters that come before her) sorry really need to express this as it has ruined our fun weekend this last few days... I posted photos from our Clear day and track day on Facebook and that was the start ARGH  but then my friends started on her it was great to know friends I know in person and online understand I have had a hard year even if family don't. My sister has always be jealous of me to this I do not understand we never got more that the other I worked to buy horses as a child not given to me, I bought my first car borrowed the money from my grandfather and paid it back so my parents could buy my sister her cortina (Ford) she has a Torana 2 door but sold it and no idea where that $$ went as my parents where not happy about it... remind you this was before she was 16 so no licence yet...

 how does she know what we are DEALING WITH she has no kids and she has not seen Alex since she was 18 months old and healthy, only a mother would understand what I am feeling and one with a CK even more so, now on top of that its my fault she was loosing her job in July & now issues again are my fault I live in QLD not SA so how did I ruin her job  and accommodation  God I must be good  OR maybe its KARMA coming back on her. ( Please understand I love my sister but this is not the first time and will not be the last, she drinks tells us all she has not then says all I have eaten today is a can or bourbon!!!!!) I do not care if she wants to drink it is her life but she needs to make a life and live it not throw blame as she will never understand that Life needs to be lived, and enjoyed not wanting what others have and well she would not like our life at the moment it is no bed of roses that she thinks it is....to be jealous of what we are getting is so sad though this has been a long hard year and she wants the perks  I would give anything to not have the perks if I could not have a child with Cancer I still have not grieved My dad this will probably be months maybe more before I can!!! as I can not relax as the whole year floods back I just want a happy Christmas with my family to enjoy and to De-stress some, Hubby is also having issues with stress but we fight alot and I know he loves me as I him but the stress is a killer :(

Sorry for the vent needed to release this is just some of it all though as I have not mentioned her name I have blocked her on Facebook for now as I am going to try enjoy Christmas not stress about her Christmas that I have no power over, she has friends and its not my fault if she loses them same a boyfriends  she had some wonderful guys that really cared but it never worked out after a few years well this is something we all have to work on not just throw it away as a relationship like friendship is a two way thing you both need to stay positive and make time for yourselves ♥

Wiggles Concert 2009 "Thanks Make-a-Wish"

Monday the 14th December 2009 "Wiggles Concert ♥"

another day on the road I will be glad to rest soon :) but the Girls are having a great time with it all :)...

Hubby didn't want to go to the track day on Saturday and was reluctant again yesterday for wiggles think to much in one weekend, but in saying that we had a good day in the end. we helped a lady get their to she got lost and asked us for directions and luckily we where going to the same place so she followed us, we arrived with plenty of time grabbed some popcorn and a drink then waited for the doors to open...

The girls eyes lit up like saucers and this made the long drive there well worth it.. the concert went for an hour and a half but we ended up leaving after an hour as Alex started to get tired and being in a place like that could be easy for her to catch a bug if any of the kiddies was sick.. we had a family we knew from the hospital sitting next to us too but their Daughter was not there due to being exposed to sickness too.. the only down side was my camera batteries died :( at the start so had to use my mobile which was not the best photos

Sorry for short post not to much to tell really hehe but here are photos

We have another event to go to through Camp Quality next weekend its a Circus with no animals should be a great day out again but have this week to try relax ♥

Family Track Day thanks to ♥Make-A-Wish♥

Sunday the 13th December 2009. we went to Kurwongbah for a Race track day courtesy of  "Make-A-Wish" well we arrived late but went and signed in we then lined up to go for a drive they where trying to get the kiddies done first was good it was all wish kids :) and their families.

 Alex at first said she didnt want a ride then only with mummy so we waited like everyone else to get a ride and we had to also wait for a car that had a back seat so took snaps while I could hehe..

finally they ask us and we get a Mazarati Silver Alex gets in with me but then wants daddy so gets out not wanting the ride mean while Robyn was throwing a hissy so she came with me in a car seat so yes she was safe... the driver took us around the track pretty fast but not as fast as the lambogini or Porsha and farari's but was faster than the police car driving around with flashing lights also giving rides. it was a great day and to see the smiles on these kids faces was so rewarding ♥

Tomorrow we are off to see the Wiggles  the 14th Dec 2009

~♥ Our Clear Day♥~

This was taken on wednesday at the Ipswich hospital in the kids play area while we waited

Saturday the 12th dec 2009 was our Clear day it was a night away for just me and My hubby ♥ we have not had this in so long

stayed at the Hotel International on the Gold Coast ( Surfers Paradise) Dinner at one of the resterants and this was a Seafood Buffet very nice and a complementry bottle of wine, then an early night ( this didnt happen we sat up watching Alien and worrying about the girls and Muggy ♥ but they all where looked after and ok,) we could not relax as every time we started to the emotions of this last year came flooding back so we just tried to enjoy it all but still not let to much out. We had a buffet breaky then back to Ipswich to get girls from their sleep over we missed them heaps :( ♥ but they where good and alex was a little upses when we got there but so happy to see us. we also got 6 roses and chocolate from CCS this was in our room when we got back how sweet was that.

Then home to see Muggy who is excited to see us and actually very good :) she is now on a longer chain over night the first night she tangled but has not done it since :) She is a cleaver puppy and her mummy is proud (Not us a friend) we passed the toy run on the way through Brassall too

we are of to a track day today with Make-a-wish but not for to long tired and want to relax ( well try)

view of the pool below us (15 floors down lol)

Night view from our room

The Toy Run Brassall 2009

~♥Good♥~ and ~*bad*~

well we have had some good and some bad over the last few days, nothing new in this house though first we had another escape from the dog but she was caught before she got to far this added stress as we have to chain her up when we are not outside with her, I am an animal lover and think this is not fair on the dog she is use to having her little buddy with her, so think she is getting bored. the girls are good with her but she gets a little over excited with it all and was a little rough with Robyn, and we are worried about Alex as a knock down could hurt her.

we have a busy weekend coming up too Saturday is our Clear day we are off to the Gold Coast for Dinner ♥ should be nice its been ages since we had some Mummy and Daddy time hehe, Sunday we are off the the Race track we got tickets from Make-A-Wish to go so Alex will get a chance to ride a Lamborghini or Ferrari (or both lol) this should be a lovely day out for the family, then Monday we are off to see the wiggles hehe

I have finally sent all our Christmas Cards too and got the last Christmas pressies to wrap just need to post 2 box's to adelaide for christmas and Birthday's  am really looking forward to christmas and hope its a lovely family day ( No Chemo is helping too)

Alex is doing well she ask's every day if her hair is growing as she wants a ponytail♥ it has started to sprout fuz lol ( My fuzzy Wuzzy )

ok here are some new photos of Muggy and the girls last night playing

♥♥♥ Our Wedding Anniversary♥♥♥

Well today is our 6th wedding anniversary and we woke up early I wished Hubby a happy Anniversary, it looked like a nice day ahead only thing we had on the cards was our house guest arriving ( Muggy  a friends Dog we are dog sitting for a few weeks )

 within a few minutes us us thinking a good day things went south, Alex started screaming out so Hubby and I went running but to late she had thrown up again and could not keep anything down, so into the bath she goes to get cleaned up, then dressed and she lays down again in her clean bed but again throws up so this time in the shower with me, and another set of clean cloths, I gave her meds to stop the nausea this worked so hope we don't get any more...

we also get a call about our clear day its set for this Saturday coming so looks like a night on the gold coast for Hubby and I this weekend to DE-stress some...will be nice to have some us time its been along time since that has happened.

by lunch time she is doing well I am happy to say and keeping water down with no trouble, my Friend arrives as her dogs are due soon,and we just wait for them to arrive... the dog transport arrives but drives straight past I go out and ask him who he is looking for and find out it is us so the dogs are finally here safe and sound... the dogs ( puppies as Alex and Robyn call them) have a big drink and a run around in the yard getting use to the new place ( well for one anyway) Maddy will be staying else where and Muggy here til my friend gets a place for them both in the near future... muggy seems OK until Maddy and mum leave then has a sook we stayed outside with her for as long as we could then went in with the girls. go back out and Muggy was gone (Not far the girls across the road bought her back ♥) and we find where she got out under our side gate but all fixed now... she was then allowed inside for awhile so she could settle in with us and has been good outside following either me Hubby or one of the girls around like a shadow so cute lol...here are some snaps

Muggy lazing in the back yard

~And More Waiting~

well its now Sunday and another long night we were suppose to have our Clear day and heard NOTHING so it is not happening this weekend they must have given us wrong details and they do wonderful work with families, still waiting on Make-A-Wish too but that's another story as we are not in a rush for that as it will be next year anyway,

♥I Love My Husband And hope he knows how much♥

VENT ALERT!!!

OK enough now about last night, we have had Gastro do the rounds in our house Robyn had it over a week ago then Wednesday I got ill Thursday Hubby got it Friday no one so we thought cool we have got through with no issues as Alex being neutropenic would not be good, well not to be our luck Hubby got to go see a mate last night for some time out of the house I got both girls to bed ( this is not normal Alex usually fights bed til after 9.30pm but was in bed just after 8pm she was not well) I got Robyn down not long after so had some me time so did more studies as want it all finished asap to not stress over a end date... Hubby called about a couple of things for a friend and to see how we where. then he came home, No idea what went wrong but we ended up in a huge fight with me even saying me and the girls would leave he seamed happy about it (ARGH DRUNK BUM) then Alex screamed out I went in she was on the floor crying about her tummy so I resettled her then 5 min later she was throwing up everywhere, I cleaned her up got everything ready picked her up from the bed and asked Hubby to get the sheet off so I could change it ( I forgot the sheet so this was another thing thrown in my face) I ended up handing Alex to him to hold she wanted MUMMY but I had a job to do changed her bed and get her re settled and walked away from the thoughts of the fight... well in minutes she was sick again :( and I decided to watch her temp it was up so called After Hrs no. we have for oncology they said bring her in just in-case its more than gastro, so I was now thinking here I am going to be driving into Brisbane at 10pm and with 2 kids I will be waking up so tried to talk to hubby he was calmer too so I got Alex ready with cream on her port just in-case they want bloods etc...

I drive in carefully get every green light and have a nice moon above which looked like a golden egg on a next of soft clouds in the dark sky♥ once there we get moved into the cubical for oncology patience they now have TVs in there too so Alex was happy they take her temp it had gone up but they where not to fussed about it we see the Dr and bloods are taken, she is given pain stop for the tummy pain and slowly settled to sleep ( 1am ???) we get the all clear to go home or stay in the back area til morning but I know Robyn would be giving Hubby grief so decided home so we leave and arrive home after 3.30am I get Robyn to sleep then send Hubby to bed I was not tired at all stayed in the girls room til 4.50am then decided to go to bed it had been a horrid night and I was emotionally exhausted :( 

But Today has been a better day Hubby & I have talked and know its just stress we have had no us time or any spacial family time so have decided to find something to do as a family that will be ok for Alex and not risk her getting sick. we have seen so many families brake down and do not want to go there but its a hard road to follow with no way off :'( only those that have been here know what we are dealing with and those that have not  (I hope you never have too)    I know our fight was nothing just a release of stress we have and no outlet to get it out :( but me writing it here was not to have him look bad but me getting most of it out  (thanks for the ear "Eyes lol" )

OK Sorry again for the vent needed to get it out I love My husband its our 6th wedding anniversary tomorrow and we again are doing nothing special for us we do have things on though...

we get to watch a friends Puppy  ( not really a puppy but a adult dog  its  what Alex calls them) as of tomorrow this will be great for the girls they so love animals so this small time with her will be good. she is a Husky named Muggy  the girls have not seen her and Maddy in 2 years so be good to see them both here tomorrow for a short time with Muggy staying on for a few weeks/months

the Puppies and Alex being nosey through the neighbours fence lol Easter weekend 2007

CT day

Well today was a nice cool day to drive into Brisbane at least the girls stayed asleep right up til we where about to leave, Alex didn't want to go nothing new there. on the drive in we had to start the ORAL contrast YUCK but she has the NGT so that helps alot with getting it down at the right times :) then we arrive at out-patience and she gets bloods done etc while we wait out the time for the CT, then off to radiology, as we are walking down I said to Alex here we go to see the donut ( what she calls it ) but she goes I don't like the Donut it makes my bottom and tummy hurt :(  but in saying that she did very well as they had me stay out of the room. they did think about taking the NGT out but was glad they didn't have to as its not something I wanted to go through again :(
then back to outies to wait to see the Dr and the girls start getting restless so we head out to the play ground for some fun while waiting and then off to the cafe for a small lunch then back to outies for more waiting...

They De access her port so her bloods must have been good but we still had a wait for the Dr. finally get in to see Dr Tim and looking out the window it started to rain heavily  I said Oh No I have towels on the line and Dr Tim goes "Bugger Bugger Bugger we have washing on the line too" hehe. but we get scan results and  blood results bloods good but she is still neutropenic ( VERY LOW so have to watch temps as a fever means a trip to hospital asap) then scan results the (Cancer tumors that are on the lymph nodes AORTA have definitely shrunk good news but their is a spot (shadow ) on her lung that will need to be watched its very small but just have to wait and see it may vanish with time.
so we finally get out have to book for another CT in Jan 2010 and an appointment for port access with bloods plus see Dr.Tim just before new year have to get a blood test next week too but may get that done here at Ipswich save the drive to brisbane...

~♥~ New week and no Chemo ~♥~

well here we are on the first week of no Chemo, all has been well this week I had the girls Christmas present delivered yesterday but still have to wait and get the all clear from Dr Tim as to when Alex can use it ( its a trampoline with net but she is not suppose to jump around just yet), Tomorrow is back to the Hospital for a CT scan with contrast both Oral and IV this is to give them a base line on the Lymph nodes(cancerous) and so when they do scans every so often they will know if they are growing ( I so hope that day never comes around she is such a bright spark in our lives, well both girls are).

 Hubby is off work til Jan when they all go back so enjoying some family time, we also have to work out when we can go to Movie world have the tickets ( Alex is her post dated Birthday pass ) they just need to know the 2 weeks we plan to go down to the Gold Coast no Idea at all!!!

we also have our wedding anniversary next Monday wow 6 yrs together just think it was 6 years ago when we where still living in Adelaide :( miss my home state too but hey we go where work sends us and well have seen some nice places around Newcastle & now going to do the same with the Ipswich/Brisbane area :).

I have been busy getting my studies done too have only 5 modules left got another DN for the last one and almost another finished to submit have til march to get it all done ( not looking forward to a couple of the assignments :o )

we have had more warm weather too and now its December will possibly get more as summer is now officially here hehe will be putting up some shade cloth for the swing set so the girls can play under it, also have had a few green tree frogs around hehe they scared Hubby last night by sitting on the screen door out back he came in saying we either have a green tree frog on the back door or one hell of a big Spider ARGH ( I do not like spiders )  and the stupid Cane toads OMG Am I over them hubby had to chase one out of the garage last night :-/

well must go settle these 2 girls so we may be lucky to have an early night (NOT!!!) have to be in Brisbane by 9am so will be at the least an hour drive in with peak traffic like normal lol

we are suppose to have our clear day this saturday too, its a night out for cancer parents but have not heard from it so will wait and see what happens